It’s catching up to me. Not sleeping. Tired. Being around people with germs = flu. My throat is sore. It is going into my chest. This is the time of year (like every year) that I get my annual sinus cold + infection. Antibiotics, here I come!! I must say though … I have been so lucky these past 3 months and not catching anything horrid that put me down and out. There was a minor cold but doctor gave me something and I got rid of it. Arggg…..
So my other short question before I go off to night night time is this … when and how does one recover from losing a child in the way I have? Is there a set time for grief? I know I wrote about it the other night. When does one think about going back to work? When should one actually go back to work? Is this a normal death in a family? Does life ever become the same again? Is what I am doing with Amanda’s legacy futile? Do I put it aside to go back to my job teaching children? This is giving me a headache plus a heartache.
My spontaneous answers and thoughts include … I am a mother foremost and always will be. My Mama Bear will always come out to protect my cubs. I will do what I need to do and whatever outcomes arise from that decision will have to be dealt with later. My life changed on October 10th. I will never be the same. I will never think the same way. I will never take life for granted. I have learned more than ever that life is to be treasured and valued. Amanda has taught not only me but the world about the life’s lessons that need to be learned by all of mankind. Someone today told me about ‘Magical Moments’. I am going to include a heading and I hope that everyone can share a ‘Magical Moment’ that they have had.
P.S. I love you!!! xoxo