January 21, 2013 – How is the weather?

Back in October, I received an interesting email from a work associate.  He told me about ‘the weather story’.  It has been 3.5 months since Amanda has been gone.  People still come up to me to say their ‘words of sorry’ and I have to go into how I am doing, etc.  It is usually ok.  Sometimes it isn’t.

I saw my massage therapist today and I guess I was so relaxed, while we talked, I cried.  It is more emotional for me to talk about Amanda when I have shared stories with them about her over the past year or so.  But I also have to remember, it is cathartic and I need to be emotional.  I have been talking to other moms who have lost a child in their life.  I just met a mom who unfortunately lost both her kids years apart.  My heart saddens.  I can’t imagine.

The weather story goes something like this…  When someone has lost a loved one, it never fails that others will come up to them and ask ‘How are you doing?’  This is sometimes a loaded question as you have to imagine how that person is really doing.  Usually the person answering will not say ‘Actually, I feel like sh*t’.  They will usually say ‘I am doing fine’ and/or just lie so as not to get into it.  So Ben’s mom (from not really liking being asked ‘How are you doing?’) began asking others ‘ How is the weather?’.  It broke the ice and conversations were easier.  So I guess if I was asked ‘How is the weather?’ — I could say it was a sunny day or a rainy/p*ssy day.  That would certainly be enough to share my mood.

Wonder what a ‘snowflaky day’ would mean?

Took my Christmas lights down today. Another sad event.  I clearly remember how excited I was to put them up for Amanda and her bday.  I want to get a Snowball Tree and plant it in the front garden.  Has anyone seen such a thing?

Niters everyone! Have a great Monday…

Hugz..xoxo

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About Carol Todd

Being the mother of Amanda Todd has lead me on this journey shortly after Amanda's death on October 10, 2012. Amanda's prolific You Tube video has been viewed over 33 million times. Through this video, there has been an increased awareness about cyberbullying, social media safety and mental health. www.amandatoddlegacy.org
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13 Responses to January 21, 2013 – How is the weather?

  1. merle says:

    “Snowflakes are kisses from heaven” Author Unknown. Well then…I guess that sounds about right, so a “snowflake day” would be a day full of Amanda’s spirit, showering you Carol and her loved ones with “snowflake kisses!”

    Like

  2. Rob says:

    O.K. Upon closer inspection, this is not the exact same plant we have.
    Will take pics in the summer, and bring camera to the nursery.
    They will tell me exactly what it is called.

    Like

  3. Rob says:

    http://hinterlander.typepad.com/weblog/2006/05/snow_in_the_gar.html
    I am not a plant expert or anything, but by doing a Very Quick google
    search, this looks like our snowball bush.

    Like

  4. Dennis Vu says:

    Snowflake days, I dont know what they’d mean… I’d be miserable from the cold, but It would be so pretty and calm outside when the snow falls

    Like

  5. Sending you big huge hugs Carol!! Massage is the absolute best thing for you right now and yes it does bring out emotions to the forefront keep it up sweetheart! My thoughts are always with you and I pray for you everyday i pray you find peace in your heart! It will come ❤

    Like

  6. merle says:

    This blog about the “weather story” immediately reminded me of a song I love by Crowded House called, “Weather With You.” For me this song always meant that we bring our moods with us wherever we go and if our mood is “sunny” then we spread the sunshine….if our mood is rainy and stormy, then we spread that as such. I never read the lyrics until today, I think you could draw alot of meaning for yourself out of them. The song is wonderful, and always gets me singing the main verse, “Everywhere you go, Always take the weather with you…” Thank you for sharing your “weather” with me and others! Here are the lyrics and the utube link. Hope you like it. http://youtu.be/uIb6I8gtgtw

    Weather With You
    Written by Tim and Neil Finn ©1991
    Found on Spirit Voices

    Walking ’round the room singing Stormy Weather
    At Fifty Seven Mount Pleasant Street
    Well it’s the same room but everything’s different
    You can fight the sleep but not the dream

    Things ain’t cookin’ in my kitchen
    Strange affliction wash over me
    Julius Caesar and the Roman Empire
    Couldn’t conquer the blue sky

    Well there’s a small boat made of china
    It’s going nowhere on the mantlepiece
    Well do I lie like a loungeroom lizard
    Or do I sing like a bird released

    Everywhere you go you always take the weather with you
    Everywhere you go you always take the weather
    Everywhere you go you always take the weather with you
    Everywhere you go you always take the weather, the weather with you

    Everywhere you go you always take the weather with you
    Everywhere you go you always take the weather
    Everywhere you go you always take the weather with you
    Everywhere you go you always take the weather
    Take the weather, the weather with you

    Everywhere you go you always take the weather with you
    Everywhere you go you always take the weather
    Everywhere you go you always take the weather with you
    Everywhere you go you always take the weather
    Take the weather, the weather with you

    Like

  7. la Punisher says:

    Just love reading your blogs Carol, They sometimes make me weep, and other times I smile… Today its both…
    Now all day i will be pondering what a ‘snowflaky day’ would be,… Nice going!!!
    “Hugs 2u” 4 all the hard work you are doing

    Like

  8. Markus says:

    I just found out that on of my favorite spring flowers is also called “Spring Snowflake” in english.
    Do you know them in Canada? Don’t know if they grow there.
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Snowflake_(plant)

    This one is nice too. Called “Snowdrop”.
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Galanthus

    Like

  9. Rob says:

    Forgot to mention,
    It is planted in the back garden because that is where the most
    sun light is.
    Amazing when it blooms.
    Snows over here in the summer . It was my moms favorite.
    Every year, it blooms more, and is more Stronger.
    Now It Makes me think of Amanda.
    Beautiful.

    Like

  10. Markus says:

    I think you mean a Viburnum opulus ‘Roseum’.? Seems like it’s also called ‘European Sowball’.
    Good night to you too.

    Like

  11. Niall McDade says:

    Thanks for sharing your story Carol. I think about Amanda every day. 😦

    Like

  12. Rob says:

    Yes.
    We have one in our backyard garden.
    It is not a tree, it is a hydrangea snowball bush.

    Like

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