June 18 – To my friends who have lost ….

Not a day goes by when I don’t think about Amanda and all the other children who have been lost to the world of bullying/cyberbullying and/or depression.  My heart goes out to the mom’s and dad’s who miss their children daily.  Who would give anything to have another hug, smile and kiss.  I have been blessed to be able to meet them virtually and in real life.  To share thoughts.  Wishes.  Hopes.  As well as tears.   For some reason, it feels safe to be able to talk and cry and grumble and weep with parents who have gone through the same emotional pain and turmoil.  We openly ask questions like ‘Will it ever feel better?’, ‘When will it feel better?’, ‘I wish that …’, ‘I cry whenever ….’, and the list of questions goes on.

We are a group of parents (like Glen Canning said in Winnipeg) — that don’t want our group to get bigger.

My special words to each of these parents is that as we continue our journey forward, we must always embrace the good times and the memories that we had with the love one(s) that we have lost.  I have been told that the pain will eventually fade but will never go away.  Do we as parents want it to fade?  Will it make us feel like we are forgetting our children?  I hope not.

There are books to read about grief.  I would just as soon talk with those that are open to talking.  I would list those that I have met but I don’t want to miss any.  I do know they are from all over the world.  I hope to meet Amanda Brownell’s mom next week in Vegas.

To my friends who have lost …. here’s to a GIANT GROUP HUG!!!  (and some FORGET ME NOTS)

P.S. – I needed chocolate the other night.  This was a gift from an elf from Whiterock last winter.  Here is the best before date on the wrapper ….


459975_643538502330383_53963562_o                 IMG_2127





About Carol Todd

Being the mother of Amanda Todd has lead me on this journey shortly after Amanda's death on October 10, 2012. Amanda's prolific You Tube video has been viewed over 33 million times. Through this video, there has been an increased awareness about cyberbullying, social media safety and mental health. www.amandatoddlegacy.org
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13 Responses to June 18 – To my friends who have lost ….

  1. Renée B. says:

    Our thoughts are with you Carol and Dawn, and all the other parents who have experienced such a loss…


  2. NoWorries says:

    well yep, the best thing to do is just carry on and ignore him. Stay happy as possible and get on with your own feelings. & don’t stop the blog or talking about Amanda because he’s probably some lonely man who wants a reaction 🙂


    • 13thmask says:

      To NoWorries: Yeah this creep is well known but the more people show recognition to him the more he performs, Please do not visit this creeps blog site, he tries for high page numbers, And you can bet that a lot of anonymous are doxxing himand end result will be he’ll be found out and outed.


      • noworries says:

        I’m pretty sure the majority of his only replies are from himself pretending to be other people. It actually really scares me because he apparently lives in the same country as me.


  3. NoWorries says:

    I am sorry to bring this up: but who is Phillip J rose, and why is he so obsessed with you and your daughter? Obviously one of the pedophiles, but why is he still revolving his life around you and Amanda?
    I wonder why no one brings this up, I know no one probably takes his ridiculous blog seriously – but it’s quite creepy to think that someone is just sat around thinking malicious things to come up with about you


  4. Dawn Steel says:

    Big hugs back… Being in the same group as you with having lost a child I can relate to the feeling of being in a group that we don’t want to get any bigger… I remember the first time after Willie’s death that I read about a young man who died by suicide (it was in our community as well) and one of my first thoughts was that I wished that no parent would EVER have to feel what I knew they were feeling that day. It’s a double-edged sword to have someone share their loss of their child with me and tell me they know how I feel… part of me is so touched and comforted by communing with someone who does truly know what I am feeling but another part of me hates that they do feel it because that means they carry the same pain.


  5. mccomastruth says:

    Thanks Carol. Big hug back!


  6. Savetheworld says:

    Re the chocolate bar…freaky 😦


  7. la Punisher says:

    That is a very great Loss that you and the other parents have to suffer which should never have happened in the first place… My heart goes out to all of you

    Hugz 2U


  8. Savetheworld says:

    I can’t even begin to imagine your pain and the pain of the other parents. I pray that you find peace in your heart. Just know that you have all of us supporting you. you are not alone. We will always be here for you. Xo


  9. haydenkowal says:

    omg! the best before date! seeing that almost brought me to tears! shes telling you shes always with you, even when your eating your chocolate!
    lots of love! xoxo


  10. Tristan says:

    This is a deep blog, with a strong message i get out of it. Love and embrace each and every day we have with the ones still in our lives,,as you can never know or expect for when tragedy’s happen,, as they happen without any or very little warning. We always think and keep hope for the most positive outcomes, and that the worst outcome ‘Will never happen”. Those words from Glen Canning are very strong and truthful – “We are a group of parents that don’t want our group to get bigger.” And No Carol, i dont believe it means you are forgetting your children, i think its part of the healing process, that is letting you adapt more to the changes and building more of an acceptance to what has happened. Just part of the healing process. I dont believe it will fade,, i just believe the pain somewhat eases off, and i hope it does ease off for you and everyone else who has lost a loved one. Interesting picture with the October 10th date,, as i come across many of items at my job place which i dated ,, and am coming across many from around October 10th of last year,, or just a few days before,, when i come across these items, i always need to stop what im doing, and take a breath and just think for a moment. I hope you have some wonderful time in Vegas 🙂


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