July 19 – Thinking about others and paying it forward ….

I have figured out that writing every few days is better than trying to write every day due to time constraints, lack of sleep, busy schedules, etc.  Also I am finding it takes time to gather inspiration and also stories.  But for tonight, here goes a story or two or even three.

Part One – I had another of Amanda’s friends over for dinner tonight.  She had some funny stories to tell me about Amanda.  I also found out that Amanda confided in her and when Amanda was sad, J would console her.  Those are the friends that Amanda needed in her life.  Not the ones that told her to ‘drink bleach and die’.  J told me a story about passing gas and a penny.  It was very funny but I am not sure she would want me to repeat the whole story.  After dinner, J and I took the dogs for a walk (Mandy went for a walk, Charlie took J for a walk) to the pond.  We walked around and stopped at the bench.  The snowflakes are still there but the balloons are now gone.  When we got home, J went up to Amanda’s room for a quiet moment.  She had brought a sucker for Amanda.  Red ones were her favourite.  Quiet time was needed for thinking and reflection.  Things sure have changed.

Part Two When we were at the park, there was a woman going for a walk.  She stopped to look at the bench.  I was there but standing a bit away from it.  After a moment, she turned to me and asked if I was Amanda’s mom.  I of course said yes.  She had seen the article in the paper of the bench and walked to the park to see it.  Then I received the biggest hug and we chatted.  It is so inspiring to be able to talk to the people who live in my community and to also see them come to the bench.  I hope that many will sit and watch the ducks in the pond swim around, the children playing, the teens swinging on the swings, etc.     It turned out that this woman was the aunt of someone else I knew.  The 6 degrees of separation thing is never that far away.

Part Three Time never stops.  There is always someone who needs someone else.  The world is made this way.  What goes around, comes around.  If we take the time to help others, it will come back to us in a good way.  I posted a story about Mady and her websites.  I have texted with the mom.  There was a picture posted of ‘Princesss Mady’ today.  She was wearing her Amanda Todd bracelets.  She is the happiest and sweetest little girl.  You would not know by looking that she has to endure 3 heart surgeries.  The giving around the world has started for Mady, all the way from  New Jersey to Australia.  People reaching out to help a family in need.  We all have minor blips in our lives.  After Amanda passed away, my friends planned meals (on a calendar) for weeks. There was enough pasta, casseroles, bread, desserts, ice cream, etc. in my freezer to last for a very long time.  That was the generosity of my community.  So from a little conversation that occurred between two moms – one in Surrey BC and one in Toronto, the need for some support funnelled back to me in BC and we got something happening.  It is still in small scale but it is something.  Remembering that something is better than nothing.  I hope to visit Mady at the hospital sometime in the next few days.  I guess the bright side is that she is indeed in a hospital with good staff.

Tomorrow is Friday.  One dog to get a haircut.  One vehicle to pick up.  Hopefully a hospital to visit.  And one wedding to go to.   To all those who read this blog, here is a challenge.  For an entire week, doing a RAK (a random act of kindness) each day.   It can be a small thing.  It could be a big thing.  Make sure to write it down somewhere.

Off to bed to count sheep.  xoxo



About Carol Todd

Being the mother of Amanda Todd has lead me on this journey shortly after Amanda's death on October 10, 2012. Amanda's prolific You Tube video has been viewed over 33 million times. Through this video, there has been an increased awareness about cyberbullying, social media safety and mental health. www.amandatoddlegacy.org
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16 Responses to July 19 – Thinking about others and paying it forward ….

  1. velvet says:

    People who were her friends told her to ‘drink bleach and die’!!!???

    BTW a lot of the time they don’t realise the pattern though. I assume They do it to try feel some power


  2. Savetheworld says:

    A lot of bullies were abused or bullied it is important for them to know that they could end the pattern! It is in their hands and never too late. Never look back look only forward , learn from your mistakes be a better person. It doesn’t matter what you’ve been through, its it who and what you are doing with your life goi g forward. Ps I try to do at least one act of kindness everyday!


  3. Savetheworld says:



  4. Savetheworld says:

    There are groups of low lives, I know because I have researched them and tracked them down! I should let anon know who they are. They post things on Facebook take screen shots and share them on other sites. These are the culprits!!!! Pick on someone your own age!! Are you proud of yourselves ? You will be found. Re the person who wrote drink bleach and die we all hope you choke on it and die. Honest to God who says these kind of things? how can anyone be so evil cruel and heartless ? Only a real sicko that’s needs to be behind bars!

    Carol get on when you can and don’t worry we know how busy your life must be. We love you we support you justice will be served.

    Big hugz lots of love! Xo ❤


    • Colin Connolly says:

      ‘Re the person who wrote drink bleach & die we all hope you choke on it & die’ – Actually ‘we’ don’t – maybe you (& others) do but I don’t.
      You do realised this was more than likely written by another kid? A wicked horrid thing to say to anyone far less another kid but is the answer really to want the bully to die? Is this a random act of kindness I simply don’t understand?


      • Savetheworld says:

        You’re right Colin I’m sorry I was upset everyone should be kind to one another but how horrid is that? When you know a person is suffering? How horrid to bring someone further down and to cause them to harm themselves I’m thinking out loud. I’m irate about that comment it sends chills down my spine!! That person needs to find God that person needs to ask for forgiveness and to try to lead a good life. Everyone e makes mistakes bad ones too but you must ask forgiveness and then move on and change and do good. Thank you for your comment 🙂 xo


    • Colin Connolly says:

      That’s fine we all say stuff in heat of moment which we regret – I’ve done my share of that too – but its important to have it pointed out.
      I can’t get my head around why kids are even saying stuff like this. We share that frustration but bullying the bullies (or anyone) is never the answer. Compassion, understanding & education is the long term goal. Thanks for your reply 🙂


      • Savetheworld says:

        Thanks for your reply ! Yes I’m glad you said something. 🙂

        I tried to post a video earlier but couldn’t everyone should watch it. Really sad. Society has really deteriorated.



  5. Hamsi says:

    Those who said “drink bleach and die”…they are not friends. I would not say that to my worst enemy. Your daughter showed extreme grace under presurre. You should be very proud of her.
    The only saving grace is, for every malicious person one encounters, there seem to be two who are full of compassion and kindness.


  6. Thank you as always for a great blog Carol. I leave for Mexico tomorrow with my hubby but we plan on doing RAK daily. We are bringing a bunch of stuff to a local orphanage where we visit. We visited there last year and brought a ton of stuff from our online radio listeners and local listeners. The kids faces lit up last year. The favorite item from a three year old boy was not the cars, the crayons or the candy. His favorite item were the socks which were way too big on him. I didn’t speak Spanish and he didn’t speak English so we spoke through looks and gestures. I was amazed at how different our chlildren are and how some things are taken for granted. Kids here would be disappointed to receive socks or underwear but in Mexico, this little one was very thankful. My husband bought some skipping ropes to bring to the orphanage and one little girl around 5 or so came up and tugged on his arm. When he turned to look, she was showing him how she could use the jump rope. It was an amazing experience and humbling. These children are kept in a compound type setting with barbed wire on top of the very high fences. The protection is necessary because people will try to climb in and take the children. We are bringing our own candy this time. Werthers was a big hit last time. Bringing Twizzlers, Rockets and some other candies. This time we have socks and shoes which will fit little feet. Wonder if that same little boy will be there? I have just the right sandles for his shoeless feet. Safari pattern. Doing a RAK is awesome not only for you but for those who you do it for. You never realize what a gift you are giving to someone who may not be expecting to receive something. Kudo’s to anyone who steps outside of their own comfort boundaries and who help others who need them. Thanks for the challenge Carol! Two weeks in Mexico and I will double your request of RAK. Have a great one. xxx


  7. merle48 says:

    We can only be at peace with ourselves and others by practicing virtue, compassion, and understanding for all…there is no better feeling then to know you gave someone in despair some hope. That is really all there is to living…so simple really.


  8. la Punisher says:

    Treating the human family right brings good karma, treating it wrong and karma comes back to bite
    Hugz 2U Carol, For doing a wonderful job


  9. jag72 says:

    In the hearts of true friends Amanda hides part of his memory.
    There are not only among teenagers. Adults also entrust the foreign family.
    A topic of behavioral research


  10. gookymann says:

    One of the nicest Snowflakes I have read. The words you write seem to be magic. The things you do are great. There was a time when I was always nice and eternally patient but those days are over and I can’t seem to find that patience like you have. You are a great example for anyone.

    ♥ U Sweet dreams Carol


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