GOOD GOLLY (ANOTHER PIECE MY ALREADY COMPLICATED LIFE RIGHT NOW)
Did I ever tell the world that I had been adopted when I was a baby? And that I have been looking for my birth parents for years but haven’t had any luck in locating them. I know that when I was born, they were supposed to be university students at UBC and in their late late teens. They weren’t allowed to keep the baby because they needed an education said their parents. So if they were alive today, they would be 18 + 53 = 71 years old. I was born in Vancouver BC.
(If a missing garden memorial stone can go viral, imagine this story of my life. Amanda never knew all this. Wish I had told her.)
Then my adopted mother passed away when I was 4’ish. My adopted father remarried and life became like Cinderella and the wicked stepmother. And I mean it. She was nasty. Things I remember …. I was an only child. The stepmother had a way of making my toys keep disappearing. She was a nurse. She was controlling. (I will try and find photos.) One day coming home from kindergarten or junior kindergarten, I saw some things burning in the back yard. Figuring it was leaves. But never expecting to see some of my finest toys int he fire.
One day she told my adopted father that he had a choice – To pick her or me. He chose her. I went to live with his sister and her family when I was 5 years old. I think I could count the fingers of how many times I saw from the day he dropped me off at his sisters to when he eventually died. (This would make a few good chapters in a book I need to eventually write.)
Long story shortened, I received an email tonight from … (keep this straight) … his mother was the older sister of my adopted mother. So that would make us cousins. The email left it to me to contact knowing what the past few years have been like. I must honestly say, it does come as a shock after 50 years (or possibly 49 years). I never really thought about having other relatives. That part made me sad. My adopted father also died last December. That’s the one where no one thought it would useful for me to know until February. Good fricken grief!! I told my son about this and he was interested in knowing tidbits more. Maybe he has cousins out there he can get to know.
When people often ask me where I gather my strength. Part of it is through the bizarre early childhood experiences that I watched, looked at and lived. I somehow also have a keen photographic memory of most of everything. All I know is that I hope no child ever has to go through the emotional baggage of that kind of emotional crap.
The email that I received had too many details for me to brush it off as completely untrue. But as people are telling me, PROCEED with caution. As I have learned to do in the past 30 months. Will see what tomorrow brings. xoxo