I just noticed that I haven’t written much in the past year and a bit. But as thoughts keep swirling through my head, I know that it is time again. Here is the first post of many to come as copied from my personal Facebook page.
Not getting into this Holiday Spirit for some reason as I see lights and trees going up everywhere. Maybe its because Amanda’s bday is coming up on November 27th. Maybe its because Christmas was her favourite holiday. Maybe its because its a happy holiday.
I have 9 days to get the Christmas lights up on the house for Amanda and her bday because as many know (or not know) it was the tradition in our house since she was old enough to talk. If anyone wants to ‘shine their Christmas lights’ for her bday November 27th, please do and share a photo. (BC Place will be lit up purple on that night also.)
Don’t get me wrong. I’m all for being happy. It’s just that the happy turns easily into sad with the memories. I remember bits and pieces the first Christmas after Amanda passed. It took all of what energies and composure was left to go through the motions. For now, its the big and little things that people do that make it better. I will tuck away the sadness here and there, but when it comes back, that is when I am the quietest and avoid the obvious. Some may see this as hypocritical for all the times that I stand out and become a voice of change but that is what actually fills my bucket. When it starts to empty, then I refill it with inspiration and hope. If I could name all those around me that do the filling, I would probably run out of space and also forget someone.
This letter (plus the flowers) came yesterday and filled my bucket and refilled my heart from the CEO of Telus on a day when I needed warmth, hope and inspiration. It definitely filled me up plus more. Thank you Darren Entwistle and the TELUS teams.
REMINDER: I love each and everyone of you out there and YOU ARE SPECIAL!! Keep talking, keep inspiring and keep living!!